I just got home from my regular Sunday afternoon hot yoga and I feel like I need to talk about it while the hate is still fresh in my mind. And, yes, it needs to be capitalised because it is The Awful. The Horror That Is Hot Yoga begins with my foolish decision to actually attend a strenuous exercise class on a Sunday afternoon. Fool.

For those of you who don’t know, hot yoga (or Bikram yoga) is an intense yoga practice performed in a heated room. The room is intentionally heated to warm up your entire body which will allow you to work deeper into your muscles, ligaments and joints without injury. The heated environment also promotes sweating, which helps flush toxins from the body. (That description blatantly stolen from my hot yoga place's website. Thanks Hot Fusion!)

My intention is to commit properly and wholeheartedly to hot yoga, with both my body and my wallet (because LORD it's expensive), to give myself ample time to prepare for Summer and swimsuit season. Yes, I say swimsuit, and not togs. Togs is such an ugly word. Instead of only paying a lot of money to sweat with other peeps staring at my sweaty patches, I also mix up my yoga and cardio and do a few routines a week at home. Thanks to the wonders of my laptop, and my large bedroom, I can follow my yoga DVDs right here in privacy without sweaty patches and strangers! I can also do a reasonable aerobic workout, on my balcony. I don't think people really look up in my street, as no-one has yet called out 'Oi! Stop lunging!'

A few weeks ago, a friend of mine (we'll call her Jess, mainly because that's her name) started going to bootcamp with a few other women from her work. They meet three mornings a week at 5:15 and workout for two hours with a trainer. I totally thought about doing it with her except for the part about 5:15 a.m. and working out for two hours. Other than that it would have been solid gold.

Jess told me that after the first day the women in the group asked the trainer if he could bring some music for them to listen to during the workout. So the next day he brought Cold Chisel's Greatest Hits and cranked that bad boy up while they went through their workout. The women in the group were puzzled by the musical choice until they realized that their trainer is in his early twenties. That poor guy had no clue what a bunch of women in their mid-thirties would want to listen to while working out. He probably went home, called one of his buddies and said, “Dude. What do you think a bunch of old women want to listen to during a workout?”

To which his buddy replied, “Dude. I don’t know. But my mum used to have a Jimmy Barnes tape that she listened to in her Corolla.” And that’s my version of how Jess ended up doing lunges and squats to Khe Sanh last week.

Needless to say, Jess asked the trainer if she could bring in her own mix for the group. And that group doesn’t know how lucky they are because Jess has been queen of the mix tape since I first met her back in 2005. Of course I guess the kids these days would refer to it as an iMix and not a mix tape. Which is a real shame.

So I’ve been inspired by Jess and I've made a new mix to help me through my time of need. And the lunges are happening now! My word, the lunges.

  
   
1. Gold Digger by Glee Cast – I was never a fan of the Kanye West version, but the cast of Glee won me over. (I heart Glee. Thanks to my Snaili who got me onto Glee!)

2. Crazy by Gnarls Barkley – I owe this one to P!nk. I wasn't really a fan of this song until I saw her live last year (more than once - slightly obsessed) and watched her rock this one out. If I could find her version of this song for my mix, I would be the happiest girl in the Gabba!

3. I Gotta Feeling by Black Eyed Peas – Without the Black Eyed Peas to get me moving, there would be no hope.

4. 4 Minutes by Madonna (featuring Justin Timberlake and Timbaland) – Same goes for Madonna and J.T, even though as solo artists go, I hate Madonna. HATE her.

5. Party in the U.S.A. by Miley Cyrus – I realise by this admission that I’ve just lost all credibility.

  

6. Call On Me by Eric Prydz - I wanna look that good in a g-string leotard. C'mon, who doesn't?

7. It's My Life/Confessions by Glee Cast – The cast of Glee makes everything better.

8. Senorita by Justin Timberlake - An oldie but it reminds me of summertime. And being at the pool. And swimsuits. Which is why I’m in this mess in the first place.

9. Bow River by Cold Chisel – Totally kidding.

10. Rock This Party by Bob Sinclar - I have been known to sing this song whilst running. Really. In public. Hey, if it gets you breathless, it's good for your fitness, right?

11. Missing by Everything But The Girl – I put this at the end of the workout because it helps me find my happy place instead of taking the iPod earbuds from my ears and lobbing the iPod as far as my puny, exhausted arms can manage to throw it.

What about you? Any good workout songs? I can’t listen to these same ones over and over again for the next two weeks or I’ll end up giving up on the whole endeavour and making a big bowl of creamy masked potato.

Which doesn’t really sound that bad in the whole scheme of things.